While all the naysayers remind us that chemistry is not the basis of a good foundation in our relationships, it is undeniably the fuel that caused the explosion of feelings when we ‘fall in love’ with someone. It is important, in fact, it is vital if we are going to fall hard into what we believe is the magic in our life.
Does it last, is it real?
Chemistry between two people is undeniably real. Through our innate, the smart body that surrounds us, both partners is receiving the signals of the chemistry of one another. They respond at that same level, never really knowing why a fire has been ignited that neither can ignore. It is real, and it is lasting.
Contrary to what we have been told it does not change or fade away like dying embers of a bonfire.
While it seems to die slowly, the truth is it has been covered over in layers of conscious thoughts and events. Chemistry happens at a subconscious level. It is out of our control which is why it is so desirable to us. This is a soul reaction. We yearn for it, have instant recall for the feelings it ignited in us and are sad when we think we have ‘lost it.’ We actually begin to deny that the emotions were ever real. We did not lose it, we buried it. If chemistry is all you ever had in your relationship, you stopped trying too soon. You held a piece of magic in your hands with the opportunity to mold it into your dreams.
If you want to recover the magic, you have to peel back the layers of emotions and events we have invited into our relationship and set them aside. They have no place in this kind of magic. How do we do this?
Look at your partner, look intently. What was the single most desirable thing about them to you when you met them? Does it still exist within them? Test the water. Look at the next ten men or women you see randomly and see how your partner stacks up against them. You will probably notice that there is still no comparison. What you saw in your partner that was so desirable still exists.
You may have experienced hurt and other emotions between you that caused you to deny the feelings that exploded and drew you together, but that is one of the things you need to peel away. It’s back to ground zero now. What was still is.
Chemistry is a primal instinctive reaction between two people. It cannot exist in a box that contains it to strict rules or moral codes. Chemistry between two people ignites a sexual union that is unforgettable. It was intended to cause an explosion; let it be.
It gets buried between what is ‘right’ or normal in a relationship; it disappears under the crushing weight of jealousy, denial and emotional abuse that can happen between two people who profess to love one another. All of these things occur when humans feel threatened in their relationship.
It is these emotions that must be peeled away to allow the fiery explosion of chemistry to reignite your relationship. It is well with the effort. You did not lose it; you buried it in your fear of losing it.